Typically, I avoid bandwagons at all cost. I have, all too often I’m afraid to say, to my own detriment even, avoided trying something popular simply so that I can stubbornly stay off the bandwagon.
Also, I tend to have a strong Negative First Reaction to things, especially new things, so I often make things harder on myself than need be.
Where the hell is she going with this?
People, I gave in and signed up for the FlyLady. I, yours truly, am a FlyBaby. In case you’re not familiar with her, the FlyLady teaches people how to gain control of their life by getting their home clean and organized, and keeping it that way. There are testimonials galore singing her praises, which of course is what made me resist. Initially.
I admit, this is not the first time I signed up for FlyLady. When Chee was a baby, I signed up and was moderately successful. I didn’t do the *whole* program, just what worked for me, but I fell off of it.
My house was much smaller, I just had one kid and she was The World’s Easiest Baby, and so my horrible lack of organization could be kept at bay.
Times have changed. My house doubled in size (which means twice as much to clean) and the number of kids doubled. We have numerous activities to go to each week, and there is, simply put, just more work that needs to get done.
And I’m miserable.
People say, “Oh, just go play with your kids, they’ll only be young for a short while, and then you’ll have plenty of time to clean.”
And I agree with that. But I’m soooo unhappy with the way I’ve been living.
I can manage to keep up on the laundry and the weekly chores. But what I *never* find time for is the bigger, deep cleaning projects (windows, blinds, freezer, etc). And even though the house is generally relatively clean, it always looks messy. Feels messy.
What’s worse is that I really beat myself up for it. I truly have felt like a terrible human being because I can’t seem to keep things picked up.
What that does to me is I’m never fully relaxed at home. I’ll sit down to play with the kids, or read, or write, but feel stressed because I *should* be doing blahbitty blah blah.
I never give up time with the kids, or time for myself, but I also often feel like I’m not fully in the moment either.
It’s a terrible way to live.
So I got to thinking about FlyLady. Again. And I decided to give her website a read. Again.
She immediately made me feel better about myself. I’m not naturally organized, and that’s okay. You are either born organized, or you have to learn it.
Reading her website truly inspired me. It was what I need to hear.
I’m blogging to you now from my tidied family room. My kitchen is clean. My laundry is all folded and put away. My meals are planned and my grocery list is written.
And the best part – are you ready for this? Accomplished by 8:30 tonight! I sat and watched a little television, caught up on my blog reader, and am writing now (it’s late, maybe I watched too much TV).
I know what chores I need to do tomorrow and I’m actually looking forward to knocking them out so I can truly enjoy myself while I play with the girls or do a bit of reading.
I sigh a contented sigh.

9 comments
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March 2, 2009 at 9:04 am
Lora
Good for you! Isn’t it a great feeling to wrap up a day feeling that sense of accomplishment?:) It sure doesn’t happen every day for me, but I love those days that it does~knowing I’m not waking up the next morning to a mess.
Now, I need to get my menus and grocery list done….I’m behind on that little task…
March 2, 2009 at 11:20 am
elizabeth channel
Wow! I’m a Fly Lady dropout, myself. Still, like you, it’s been years since I tried it. I’ve added another baby and a bigger house. Hmmm. Maybe I should check it out again…
(I’m a little afraid…)
March 2, 2009 at 3:02 pm
Jordan Sadler, SLP
Hmmm, this is tempting…! Good for you!
March 2, 2009 at 3:30 pm
Laura
Congrats on regaining control. Never heard of Fly Lady. I live in a shoebox, and we have modern taste in decor (minimal), so we’ve de facto adopted a spartan lifestyle. Which I think helps because as you point out, more space is more to manage. Of course, the downside is: we have zero space.
March 2, 2009 at 4:18 pm
Patty
Wow, I have heard about flylady before, but haven’t really tried it. It sounds like something I need, though. i think I may be checking it out soon!! Glad you are feeling better about your organization and yourself.
March 3, 2009 at 3:44 am
leechbabe
Congratulations on success with FlyLady.
I tried her but it was so frustrating getting Northern Hemisphere cleaning schedule when I live in the Southern Hemisphere and our seasons are opposite.
March 3, 2009 at 8:41 am
ALBJ2YO
Hey. Got your message over on my blog – thanks for reading! I will tell you a funny story re:hyperlexia b/c we have a love/hate relationship.
Just after our diagnosis eval last June I began my thorough scour of the internet. I ran across hyperlexia.org & proceeded to call the psychologist that sat in on the eval. to tell her that I thought I found a more fitting diagnosis.
She quickly told me that it was not an official diagnosis, that the ’skill set’ sometimes does accompany autism. And in a motherly tone told me that they would not give him a less broad label until he was at least 3 years, 3 months old.
The love = I think what she was saying to me ‘in a motherly tone’ was actually one of those **wink wink** leave it alone type conversations where she was staying within her boundaries, yet warning me that changing his label would be a loss of services.
The hate = I wish it WERE a diagnosis in and of itself – but I know better now.
Anyway, I tried Flylady once. I am a cleaner/organizer from birth, but never have the right tools/home/time to do it. I never got to a point where I knew what cleaning I needed to do each day in order to be DONE & have the whole house cleaned approx once a month. Does it do that now? B/C that’s all I really wanted. To be DONE & A sense of accomplishment would be so wonderful.
Well, it sounds like WE have lots in common (i could have written your post about beating myself up and not relaxing etc) and so does one of our kids. I would LOVE to hear more about Chee (and I will be reading from now on) and I would love to know if you have any book rec’s on hyperlexia. To understand more would be great!
March 3, 2009 at 10:29 am
jesswilson
oh the shoulds and the oughts ..
i live among piles of them, far higher than the piles of actual stuff
flylady huh?
hmmm
March 5, 2009 at 12:14 am
asdmommy
I Love Flylady! Unfortunately I don’t keep up with it. But in theory I love her practices! LOL!