Here and there I have read adults on the autism spectrum talk about the difficulty they have recognizing faces. Even if it’s a good friend or a frequently-seen person, there are times they simply can’t recognize a person’s face. Maybe it happens all the time, I’m not sure. I think I read from one person they rely on other features such as hair or height or, perhaps, glasses to trigger that recognition.
I have also read of parents speculating that their child has a type of face blindness. This isn’t anything I’ve ever seen in Charlotte. That doesn’t mean it isn’t at times a challenge for her, but it is not something that I ever witnessed myself.
Until…
This morning Charlotte was very upset about going to school. She claimed she didn’t feel well but when pressed for specific symptoms, she came up short. She started telling me she didn’t think that N wanted to be her best friend anymore. When I probed about that she said N didn’t say anything about not being friends anymore to Charlotte, but that she didn’t sit by her on the carpet during one particular time in class. I continued to probe.
Eventually she shared that when N came to school her hair was cut very different. “And I didn’t even recognize her! She came and sat by me and I didn’t know who it was. Then she talked and I knew it was N. But her hair was really different, and I think it should go back to the old way!”
Wow. It really stunned me that she didn’t recognize her friend because she had a different hair cut. Via email her teacher confirmed that N’s hair was cut in a very different style.
I don’t see this as a hugely debilitating issue for Charlotte. If it were, I think I might have picked up on it sometime in the last 3-4 years. What I do see it as is further evidence that her mind does work in a way that is much different than mine. Sometimes I forget that. She has her challenges, but for the most part Charlotte does so very well, it’s easy to forget that she has an IEP for a reason.
***
Speaking of challenges, things are about to get challenging here at home in the kitchen. Over the last couple of years it has become very clear that Charlotte’s behavior problems are caused by food. The problem behavior is always the same (aggression, which can include hitting and other things, and screaming) and it’s always brought on by a food that Charlotte has eaten a lot of over several days in a row. Recently both mandarin oranges and lemonade were the culprit. I started seeing it go that direction with popcorn recently but I nipped that by stopping the popcorn before things got out of hand. It’s fine to eat popcorn and those other foods … just not every day.
I began to wonder if gluten was the underlying problem with these other foods. The number of foods she has to limit keeps increasing, and the fact that foods affect her behavior is, to me, very unusual. So I ordered a stool test and gene test. The stool test, which looked for IGA antibodies to gluten, came back positive. The gene test identified two nearly identical genes for gluten sensitivity, indicating she got one from each parent.
This weekend is our last big hurrah with gluten before we all go gluten free come Monday. For Charlotte, it will mean gluten free for life. At some point, I’ll have the other two kids tested as well. The whole family is going to go gluten free because it will just be easier if we all eat the same things.
Truth be told, I’m dreading gluten free living. It’s a hassle. I know once we get in the groove, it will become second nature. Hopefully it will be worth it in the long run.
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